A New Old Journey
Over the past several months, I have been doing some inner reflection. Some may say I have been trying to find myself. While that may be true, I realized that like everyone else, I am on a journey.
I took a job many years ago that led me down the path I am on. Money and supporting my family were the basis of everything I did. While these two things were noble as a provider for my family, it left a hole in my inner man. My family tried to complete me, God filled in a lot of what was missing but I kept feeling like there was more to it. I will not get into the argument of God not being able to make me totally complete for He “gives us the desires of our heart”.
As a child and young man, I spent a good amount of time in the woods. I looked for the weekends where I could be outside for days and while some of them required me to come home before dark, some were great overnight trips. I surrounded myself with nature’s sounds, smells, and feels. Learning everything I could about the circle of life and what made things happen. I was a naturalist, a botanist, an archeologist, and a conservationist. I may have even been part Forest Ranger.
There were quite a few weekends that I would build something outside. A fort, a wall, a gully to send toy soldiers into only to be washed away with the rain or the occasional water hose. This building led me to want to be an architect. The curves and designs of wood and the physical structures of steel, brick, and glass were magnificent and the pay would not suck. But there was another plan.
I flunked out of college due to pure selfish ignorance and tried to find a job that I would be happy with. Some of the skills I had learned over the years helped push me into the Engineering field, all the while something was still missing.
Drinking and a failed marriage, did not help me at all because I still felt a pull to more. Hear what I said…a pull to more, not greatness.
The path I was on was still a noble one that would provide for my family. The IT industry has been good to me. But this was not the path I wanted to be on and recently, it is not the path I want to be on.
The inner reflection has opened my eyes and heart. I have been absorbing a lot of things just by listening. Listening to my heart, listening to others, and listening for the Still Small Voice. This basis is where Instinct Survivalist came from. It spawned from tracking my dad through the swamp and me responding about using my instincts but deep down, the still small voice led me to where I needed to be.
It is after 26 years in the IT Industry and quite a bit of being dissatisfied, that I have started a new journey. The desires within me long to be fueled. Part of this journey is just spending more time outdoors while another part is specific skills. The foundation is utilizing these skills to provide for my family since that is still a requirement. I am very thankful for the Internet because it helped me hone in on what I need to do.
This journey will come in several parts and I want to be able to share it with you. One trail will be education, which means I will probably be going back to school. Another trail will be the root desire to expand on things I have been taught over the years. This call into the raw, primal being is the fulfillment in expanding my primitive skills levels and teaching wilderness skills at a greater level.
I learned a lot through various teachers as a child and young adult and have been getting refreshers over the past couple of years. But it was not until a recent trip with my wife that I fully understood what the new journey would be, a continuation of the old one.
What is your pull or desire? Are you truly doing what you are called to do? I will be sharing more of this journey as it progresses.
Use your instincts to survive